Killed Like This

Discussion in 'Your Projects' started by a life in ashes, Apr 7, 2005.

  1. #1
    a life in ashes

    a life in ashes mercury summer

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    a life in ashes, Apr 7, 2005



    Killed Like This

    You said it’s over so how come,
    The times have changed but not for me,
    I’m stepping down to him if you,
    If you want it,
    I will abandon all,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I’m killed like this,

    You said it’s over so how come,
    Are you still waiting for,
    This the knight in shining armour,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I’m killed like this,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I’m killed like this,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I’m killed like this.
     
  2. #2
    Muri

    Muri It never ends.

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    Muri, Apr 7, 2005



    Woah. Nice. ;)
     
  3. #3
    D_A_V_I_D

    D_A_V_I_D Pure Pwnage

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    D_A_V_I_D, Apr 7, 2005



    again. a great poem. this one had a good flow. it is just a bit too short for my likng. this really only has two 4 line verses and one 3 liner. i really like what your doin though. Live and learn. Keep it up. Rember it is what you want from the poem. everyone is going to critisise you.(or at least they should) because this is what makes us stronger and lets us improve ourselves. But if you dont like a suggestion. Dont use it. They're only tips
     
  4. #4
    Il inno di morte

    Il inno di morte A noi si schiude il ciel...

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    Il inno di morte, Apr 7, 2005



    hey, nice one. I must say i didnt entirely like it, but thats just my humble opinion. I believe you've got a good start, but i believe you should work on it a little bit more. Keep working, i believe this could become a great poem. dont give up. :p
     
  5. #5
    MeLiS_

    MeLiS_ Well-Known Member

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    MeLiS_, Apr 8, 2005



    really nice.. B)
     
  6. #6
    a life in ashes

    a life in ashes mercury summer

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    a life in ashes, Apr 8, 2005



    here we go i lengthened it. see what you think,

    Killed Like This

    You said it's over so how come,
    The times have changed but not for me,
    I'm stepping down to him if you,
    If you want it,
    I will abandon all,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I'm killed like this,

    If you are over please explain,
    Are you still waiting for,
    This knight in shining armour,
    If you love me don't kill me,
    I'm always the easy prey,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I'm killed like this,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave this chemical romance,
    Leave that all behind,
    I won't care anymore,
    For what is the care,
    If you don't really want me,
    I'm killed like this,
    I'll die like this,

    Stop the hang up,
    Leave that all behind,
    For what is the care,
    I'm killed like this.



    thoughts on it now please...
     
  7. #7
    fallenangel

    fallenangel Well-Known Member

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    fallenangel, Apr 8, 2005



    i think that this part really adds to it! well done! :D
     

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