...due to a terrible writer's block. tell me how you find it anyway... Staring at a blank page, I pray for a blanker hell, I pray for empty walls and rooms, I pray for no smell, I pray for no reminiscence of yours, I pray for loneliness, I pray for a vacant heart, a mind with an invisible mess. I’m broken from the centre, my soul ripped right out, Everything I say is emptier as they flow from my mouth, I don’t mean what I write; don’t mean what I say, Don’t mean anything, I can’t think, I’m left this way. The phobia of having you back and having to explain, The fear of letting myself go, and losing you again. The piercing pain that yells when I’m beside you, The stake through my heart, the absence of truth. Just another time and I’d swear I’d die, Another vision collapses and I helplessly cry, Insane and abandoned, lost somewhere unseen, Drifting away and farther, somewhere I’ve never been. Stop following me, I want to be alone, Leave me like the times you’ve left me before, No, I don’t want to feel you anymore, Get away, you’re too close, poisoning my core. No, I don’t want to love you, don’t look at me that way, No, it’s too hard to forget those sadistic games that you played, No I don’t want your tears upon my lips; I don’t want to stay, Leave me alone, leave me, go away. Stumbling over the moss infested rocks, I try to escape, But you follow me like a shadow, like the moonlight drape, I don’t need you anymore, but you always seem to be there, I shut my eyes and scream my helpless prayer. I pray for blank solitude, I pray for a blanker hell, I pray for empty walls and rooms, I pray for no smell, I pray for no reminiscence of yours, I pray for loneliness, I pray for a vacant heart, a mind with an invisible mess. But it’s too hollow, it seems like I still need you, It seems like I hate you, but I can’t live without you, And there lingered in my feeble thoughts my prayer, The answer I needed, the cure to my despair. Reaching a cliff, I laugh at once, What soulful bliss can conquer with just a jump? A leap and I’m free, not bounded by your presence, No more of you and your haunting essence.
^^ My favourite part. I loved it, it's beautiful. Your writer's block doesn't stick out, and though some lines seemed forced, it flowed well.