One of my first songs I've written and this is nowhere near complete, I would like feedback! "Unify" As the sunlight reaches the sky And you think that you're gonna die A gun and a memory keeps you alive This misery kills you on the inside The feeling that you'll never see them again They fake a smile, but you can't pretend You're wife, you're daughter, they shed a tear The last thing you wanted is for them to disappear [Pre Chorus:] Now this melody is all that is left Bring on the chorus to save all the rest [Chorus:] Unite us We fight for the red white and blue Unite us We fight for the only thing that is true We are protectors of creation Brothers of a nation Unite us You never thought it would be as bad as it seems Was this really your greatest dream You had always thought about the honor, the glory But everyone will eventually forget your story Thinking about all the things that you regret Everything that you should always forget It comes back like a haunting photo That painful memory from way long ago [Pre Chorus:] Now this melody is all that is left Bring on the chorus to save all the rest [Chorus:] Unite us We fight for the red white and blue Unite us We fight for the only thing that is true We are protectors of creation Brothers of a nation Unite us [Bridge] Bring out the sick, the poor, the wounded from the battleground The lonely, the sad, those hiding in the underground So I will sing you this song To bring you back to the place Where you all belong Unify us! Unify us! Unify us! Unify those in their broken state Unify We fight for the red white and blue Unify We fight for the only thing that is true We are protectors of creation Brothers of a nation Unify us
I plan on making it a rap song. The lines "Unite us" and "Unify" will be sung as a group, but all the rest will be rapped by one guy. Think of it as Hands Held High combined with Debris.
Wow, that's definitely not the vibe I got when originally reading it! But I do see how that could pan out. I hope it goes well!