hey i want to know your opinions this song i wrote, still in the works, kinda a very roughf version of it, and want to know your thought before i finesh it.... “Bring Me Down” {Beta version 2} [1 or 2 more versions to come] [Rap intro1] [ Pushed by you close to the limit/ peering into the shadows ahead/ my fait about to be shown/ on the jagged edge of your heart/ left alone in the dark/ no light to show me a way/ the sun looks gray/ in a fictitious world created by me/ malicious thoughts break free/ from me to you/ I am just left with the broken pieces/ laying witness to my shattered soul/ I’m going to take control/ and just let go/ let the violence break free/ and totally consume me] [Verse 1] I have now yet another problem to add onto/ an already long list/ having no one to take off the load/ anger grows and I am left to look through the shadowy fog and thick mist/ your fall from my heart and mind/ could never have come at a worse time/ bearing down on me the pressures of a painful existence/ I fear I cant defend myself from the demons/ my resistance wears thin/ the struggle from within now manifests itself on the surface/ sweat drips from my face as I wish you could still be/ close to me to set me free/ now you’re the greatest problem grinding on my thoughts/ and how you just heartlessly left me/ you wont even speak to me anymore/ now I just want it back / the heart you !@#$$ TORE! [Choirs 1] Want to break free of my chains/ and take you out of my soul Want to break free of my chains/ and be rid of my misery Want to break free of my chains/ to be alive once again Got to break free of my chains/ before I loose control [Verse 2] The sky pitch black and sunless/ my thoughts infected with projections of suicidal madness/ your black mark forever obstructing my self-reliance/ but then I hold myself back to reminisce on better days/ angelic lights surrounding you like something from heaven/ gold dust falls but then quickly turns to ash in the light of the present/ your image tainted and transformed to something horrific/ jolting me back to the way things are today/ my harsh reality is more than I can take/ my head sinks low because I can feel it happening/ I know I am about to break/ I know I am going to BREAK! [Choirs 2] Want to break free of my chains/ and take you out of my soul Want to break free of my chains/ and get rid of this misery Want to break free of my chains/ to be alive once again Got to break free of my chains/ before I loose control [Ending] [Pushed by you close to the limit/ hurt by my own thoughts/ and filled with things I lament to/ with dreams of you that still play in my head/ creating a recurring template/ filled with hate and dread/ returning to my own guilty thoughts like a dog to its vomit/ I’m blasting ahead to my own destiny as fast as commit/ with no more remorse left in me/ I have I give out one last cry to my enemy{me}/ before letting go realizing there is no victory/